Today I am going to a concert. Walking up the steps to the hall a man hands out a paper calling me Sir, then stopping and changing it into Madam. I smile and pass the door to the hall. i am wondering if he might be confused now or thinking that he made a mistake calling me sir? English people are always trying to be polite and I think they learn that it is polite to say a title like Sir or Madam when talking to someone. Two groups of people, men and women. But what do you do if someone doesn´t fit?!
Another day in a cafe. Soon they will close and the service person lets people know that soon they will close. Doing this the person uses the expression Lady to let the “women” know that they will be closing in 10 minutes. One of the guests doesn´t like to be called Lady. She had been talking to herself or some invisible people for quite a while. Now I can hear pieces of word, like: This L A D Y word and feminism…..but cannot really understand what she is speaking about. It sounds as if she is giving a talk to an audience at the University, just that the audience is invisible for me.-
I am curious and walk up to her before leaving and ask her how she wants to be adressed as, if not as Lady. She replies that she does not speak with me. Doesn´t she speak with everybody, or might she think I am a man and she doesn´t speak with men? No idea. –
In the internet I am trying to find an explanation for her behaviour. I want to know if there is a certain meaning connected with the word, LADY that I do not know and that might be related to feminism. I remember when I was young and my aunt told me that soon I would be a young Lady that I really hated that. As to me being a lady meant to sit still, to put make up onto my face and to wear clothes that would make it impossible for me to move free and climb up a tree!
In did try to find an explanation for her behaviour. I want to know if there is a certain meaning connected with the word, LADY that I did not know about and that was related to feminism movement.
But instead of finding an explanation I come across a headline in which they say that one of the german politicians sees a sign of tolerance and open mindedness in Conchita Wurst winning the eurovision songcontest
I must say I cannot agree. If I – a real bearded woman – cannot find a job in Germany as a teacher in a school, in a kindergarden or as a sales person in a shop, and are told that I can only have the job if I did shave, then I do not see the open mindedness.
England is much further than germany regarding tolerance and open mindedness. I can find a woman with a beard working in a shop, a bearded woman working as a teachers assistant and I finally found a job in an office.
The eurovision song contest is a happening for the media and of the media. Freedom is different in the media than in daily life. You can behave strange or look strange or different in the media, but if it comes to daily life people react different.
Because an artist with an artifical figure did win the eurovision song contest, does not mean that people are now tolerant towards homosexuals or any kind of people that are not conform with the norm.
To really change something, I think it is necessary that people meet one another and make the experience that there is no need to be afraid of the ones that are “different” or live different.
In the heads of people are so many old ideas coming from the ancestors, some of them are that circus people are stealing children, that gypsies are always stealing and that homesexuality is like a sickness that you can catch if you come in contact with a homosexual person.
Movies could help to let go of these ideas, but even better is to meet one another and to make other experiences.
People of all kind could visit schools and give talks about their lives in order to open up the mind of the next generation and to make them see how colorful the world is. Something they already do now and then in schools, but could be done more.
The concert was good! It was a band from canada the Hutchinson Andrew Trio who came to the Internationalen Bath Music Festival.
Here is an example of their music:
This evening Iiro Rantala from Finland will be playing. Looking forward to listen to him!
And tomorrow Jan Gabarek and The Hilliard Ensemble are playing in Bath Abbey but unfortunately it is alrady sold out. Would have liked to listen to them too.
Its great listening to some good music!
Filed under: a different life